Solitude

My lollipop - my sweet candy, Closer. I want you closer to me. It's not a love song - no sappy love song, Reality. It's never what you see on screen. I know that I'm different, I know that I am not what you need. I try to be perfect, Yet again I try to please you, Still, You refuse to glimpse. It's been far too long, More then a year, A constant question, "Do I still want you dear" We had our moments And now that's over You're gone while I'm stuck here. I knew I was just stupid - naive little child. Thought this was a movie - Leaned in for a kiss. Maybe. Perhaps. We could be perfect. Perhaps. Maybe I want you to look at me like how you look at her, And I want you to know that I'll be here for you. I will stay, but will you?

I am afraid to be alone, and I don't know why. All night I tried to be myself, but I couldn't tell how. I don't know when this all began, "acts" piled up and fake commends. I want it all over. Throughout the years I've been so blind, but now it's clear. The sad truth is, I've got nothing to lose, and nobody cares what do I do. But if I don't do anything, I know that I'll be on my knees. Breathing like rats, instead of bleeding out my regrets. So I'm begging please, I don't want to lie anymore. Not him nor to her. And not to me.